Reprieve

You’re at your breaking point. For the past few days, heck no–past week and few days–you haven’t slept that well. It’s wearing you down; you can feel it in your bones, in your bloodstream, in the way your heart suddenly seems to be a fragile beating thing. You just want it to end, and yet you are not sure if the end would bring a new beginning or you’d just be stuck on a loop, doomed to repeat all the shit you’ve gone through because of your own goddamn stupidity. Whatever it is that’s making you have this resolve to fucking try and see things to the end and fucking fight, you’re quite thankful for, but not that much. It’s not the kind that makes you want to live anyway. It’s not even close to hope. But there it is. And for now, you could live with that.

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